April 1st is more than Easter to me

This next week is very significant in the Christian faith. It brings with it, the day we celebrate Christ's resurrection after His sacrificial death on the cross.

It will mean something more for me as well. April ushers in the anniversary of my mom's death (on April 9th). But April 1st is her birthday, the first one we will weather without her. I do not know right now what it will be like to celebrate Christ conquering death while remembering the loss of my mother with my very human emotions.

There is a song that comes to mind as I think on this... MercyMe's "Even If". Particularly the second verse and chorus:

VERSE 2
They say it only takes a little faith to move a mountain
Well good thing...a little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose to leave mountains unmoveable
Oh, give me the strength to be able to sing "It is well with my soul" 

CHORUS
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty Hand
But even if You don't, my hope is You alone
I know the sorry, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't, my hope is You alone

God could change it all. But my faith is not shaken because He doesn't take my grief away. And that firm foundation in Him is partly due to the legacy that my mother left in me. A legacy of trust in Him.

But it also soothes my heart to know that Christ Himself beseeched His Father about the suffering He was to endure:

"He fell on His face and prayed, saying, 'My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will.'" ~ Matthew 26:39

He prayed this same thing TWICE. And He was perfect. And had a perfect relationship with the Father, perfect trust, perfect understanding.

Then I know the Father understands when I ask to be relieved of my grief, but accept that it is the product of the deep love I have for my mother.

Just one more way we are intimately known and loved.

And because Jesus did take this cup, did accept His Father's will, my mother has eternal life. And I will too. So, while the grief is hard, I do not mourn as those who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Because of Jesus. So, I will celebrate His sacrifice come April 1st. And I will celebrate my mother's legacy in me through Him.

Because He is great. And greatly to be praised.